Happiness at church

*But first, an observation.* Listening to the radio news, some self-appointed community activist was unhappy that his school district appointed a new superintendent without the public input process. He said this was racist, because the district is 60% minority, and the school board was ignoring them. *60% minority?*

Anyhow, on to the main point. In a discussion the other day, I posited that it was Protestant to seek happiness during liturgy. This aroused some irritation from my family, who shouldn't be shocked by these things by now. My wife said that upbeat hymns and homilies are part of "modern Catholic worship." The next sentence redacted by the author, 03/23/08, for being particularly uncharitable.



Obviously, the novelty of all this happy-clappy baby food wears off, because nobody goes to church in America. And that's because it is spiritual baby food; it's not going to be satisfying to someone with a deep, unfulfulled spiritual hunger.

If you are satiated by it, you either don't know that there's anything else or are irretrivably shallow. All this "joyous noise" nonsense is all a humanist celebration of man. What kind of arrogant bastard actually sings "They will know we are Christians by our love?" Can you see St. Augstine doing that? The great doctor of the church worried constantly about the state of his soul. Our intent going liturgy should be atoning for all the horrible things we did all week, and preparing ourselves for communion with God - not patting ourselves on the back for being so good and doing a little jig in the pew.

Vote Taco Bell, '04

The Associated Press reports (July 26, 2004) that a donkey named Taco Bell has been re-elected Mayor of Florissant, Colorado. As part of the 15th annual Heritage Days celebrated in the unincorporated town (located between Divide and Lake George), residents poked fun at the political process by electing the donkey as mayor. According to the AP report, Taco Bell won re-election against two no shows and a white donkey named Birdie. "We had one who was colicky, so he couldn't make it, and another one's trailer broke down, so he couldn't come either," said organizer Tracie Bennitt. The Pikes Peak Historical Society stuffed Taco Bell's ballot box with donations ensuring him a second term. Dagney Hales, 8, and Sam Easto, 7, fed the mayor wild goldenrod, green stalks with little yellow flowers, and Teller County Sheriff Kevin Dougherty swore in the incumbent. "This is good and rural," Dougherty said. "We love doing this kind of stuff."

From The Remnant.

I'd say the point is that Florissant can live without a mayor; but I had a "moderate" friend who saw it as a statement of how all politicians are asses, Republicans, Democrats, Conservatives, Liberals, RTLs, Constitutionalists, Marijuana Reformers, etc. I hate equivocation.

Another article, which I didn't save, mentions how the liberal/conservative split in the Church isn't between two opinions, but between people who don't think we should have opinions on things, and people who do.

And why a children's choir?

This needed it's own free-standing post. See below for what I am talking about.

Why a children's choir? There are only three reasons that come to my mind: gross, nauseating, sugary sentiment; a desire to involve children and keep them interested; some idiot parent or group there of think it's "cute" to see their kids sing.

Well, Mrs. Soccer Mom, the liturgy is not a school concert.

The liturgy is serious business; it's the closest you get to God here on Earth, unless you happen to be Bernadette, St. Joan, or one of the Twelve Apostles. Would you think a child mechanic working on your car is "cute?" How about an eight-year-old doctor diagnosing a lump on your arm? Would you hand Fluffy over to a pig-tailed, befreckled, four-foot-tall, elementary school-aged veterinarian?

And now let's consider what's more important: your car, your cat, your body, or God. We trust the first three to adults with degrees and experience, and some of us hand The Lord over to crumb crunchers. Why not ordain toddlers? Wouldn't that be darling. A whole liturgy performed by children. And the precious little vestments we could sew for them! Think of how much more felt we could cram into the churches!

My pet peeve hymn

"Peace is flowing like a river"

"Peace is flowing like a river. Flowing out through you and me--.
Spreading out into the de-sert. Setting all the captives free. Setting all the captives free.

Joy is flowing like a river. etc...

Hope is flowing like a river. etc...

Love is flowing like a river. etc..."

What does this hymn mean? I think I may understand it better if I was high. Even if peace could, really or metaphorically, flow like a river, how would that set captives free? And why the desert? Is it because the desert is dry, and needs a peace river, or because the captives are there?

And would peace really set all the captives free? Think about emptying the jails were you live. That would certainly not bring about more peace. And, if the captives are sideways reference to something/someone else, what something is it, and why don't they mention it directly?

Why would this be in a Catholic liturgy? There is not theology, no reference to God, the Mother of God, or the saints. It also humanity centered - peace flows from you and me, no mention of peace or love originating with The Lord.

This feel-good, meaningless, granola-eating, effeminate piffle just has to stop. The next worst would be "Here I Am, Lord." I was at a Ukrainian Catholic church (one that I don't usually attend), and a children's choir sung it during the Eucharist. I almost passed out. I'll save the analysis for another day.

Strange train of thought

Heard today on my local talk radio station, during the news: "A man dressed as Batman climbed onto a ledge on Buckingham Palace to protest the lack of rights for divorced fathers in Britain. The Dow is up 25 points."

Just some funny jokes

A guy walks into a bar in Arkansas and orders a white wine. Everybody sitting around the bar looks up, expecting to see some pitiful yankee queer.
The bartender looks up and says, "You ain't from around here, are ya??? Where ya from, boy?"
The guy says, "I'm from Iowa."
The bartender asks, "What the heck you do in Iowa?"
The guy responds, "I'm a taxidermist."
The bartender asks, "A taxidermist? Now just what the heck is a taxidermist?"
The guy says nervously, "I mount animals."
The bartender grins and shouts out to the whole bar, "It's okay boys, he's one of us!"
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How do you know when you're staying in a Kentucky hotel? When you call the front desk and say "I've gotta leak in my sink" and the person at the front desk says "go ahead."
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From this redneck site.